November 20, 1965
The Princeton University Marching Band presents a long, hard look at some current events.
Forming a moon on the field, the only bright spot in an otherwise darkened community, the Band salutes the latest triumph of the Civil Rights Movement — The Great Eastern Blackout.
We ask whether this is the beginning of a new trend in integrationist techniques. “That Old Black Magic”
(Band forms a crescent moon)
Coming from the woods, Danny Dartmouth, in the true Johnny Appleseed tradition, goes to the Big City to sow his seed. But after pounding the pavement for hours, Danny can find no fertile ground, and he sighs:
“Where Have All the Flowers Gone”
(Band forms a limp flower)
We next see a Dartmouth undergraduate as he picks up a girl for the first time in four years. Not knowing what to do he offers her a bottle of wine, but he is interrupted and pulled before the authorities. As the Band points to the evils of wine by forming a statutory grape on the field, we hear the unfortunate undergraduate explaining his case to the judge.
“I Saw Her Standing There”
(Band forms a grape)
In an attempt to make the controversial math building seem shorter, the administration plans to put the entrance on the 13th floor. Princeton Charlie feels that this building would be more appropriate on the Dartmouth campus. Forming a pair of wings on the field, we see that the typical Dartmouth undergraduate could:
“Walk Right In”
(Band forms wings)
Ladies and gentlemen, inasmuch as there is not the slightest chance that the networks will have the courage to televise this halftime show, the Princeton University Band has given vent to its true feelings about vast wastelands in general — and the television industry and Yale University in particuluar.
(Joke retained from original show — Mao Tse-Tsung’s salute to the world, Lady Bird with jaundice, goldfinch, etc. — “Yellow Bird”)
Princeton Charlie turns from the international scene to problems closer to home, and finds Eli Yale reduced to searching the well-known Hotel Taft to come up with a date for the weekend. Thwarted at every turn, the poor Yalie at last discovers a sweet young thing asleep in her bed, and enters — her room. Eli takes great care not to disturb her sleep, but can scarcely contain himself nonetheless. Forming two lips on the field, the Band plays
“Tiptoe Through the Tulips”
The outcome of this encounter in the night shows up a few months later when the Yalie receives a worried phone call from the girl. After a brisk consultation, the young lady in question, rather than risk a trip to Puerto Rico, decides to take matters into her own hands. The Band forms a coat hanger on the field and bids farewell to what might have been as we play
“You Must Have Been a Beautifyl Baby”
(Band forms coathanger)
However, Eli is not the only victim of his own indiscretion in the course of history. We reach back to classical times to find King Midas laughed at by all his friends because of his strange powers. But old Midas took all their criticism in stride — and invited them to do likewise. Forming a gesture of defiance on the field, the Band’s closing number is